I once had a sore foot, and it was lonely.
So, I got another and they were a matching pair.
My foot was happy. My foot was still sore,
but together they were, yes, a matched pair.

Sore feet! In the morning
when they're kissing each other's toes.
Sore feet! In the evening
while they're talking about each other's woes.

Sore feet! They do not like to be
lonely, lonely feet.
They need some company.
Company is what I think.

And the thing to do is to make the other sore.
I recommend walking on things that are not the floor.
Maybe you should walk on some nails, or maybe some LEGO.
That would be swell. Make your feet so, so sore.

How do you like your feet?
Do you like one more?
If one foot is liked more than the other,
some people say that invites cancer.

If you like your left foot
more than your right foot
some people think they should chop one off,
but I think that's mostly just silly.

Just let one one, one get sore.
One that you truly, truly adore.
And see what they discuss
when they meet so quietly.

I think they want to be, yes, matched and happy.
Maybe really hap, hap, happy.
Singing and dancing
with rose petals and lotions galore.

Some people want them matched
all knobby and in so much pain,
but I suppose that would be fine
if you can still dance.

Because some people they dance
on their feet to make them sore.
Some people, they like to prance
and they like to kick at the door.

What do you do to make them sore?
That is what I'm asking.
How many things do you adore,
and are your feet one of them?

Sore feet and sore thumbs and sore nose!
Sore eyes and sore ears and sore toes!

How many things can be sore
and how many things can you lop off?

Do you think you should just lop it,
if it feels a little bit sore.
I think that if you chop it,
you will invite trouble galore.

Don't just chop at your body chop-chop
because that makes more problems.
Just, perhaps, buy lotion
and feel a little less sore.

Sore feet! Sore feet!
They have so many lotions.
Maybe buy some Icy-Hot
if that can solve your problems.

I hope that you liked this song.
Liked it and it didn't make you sore.
But if it made you sore,
perhaps there's lotion for your ears.